ON EGNATIUS OF THE WHITE TEETH
Egnatius for that owns he teeth snow-white,Grins ever, everywhere. When placed a wight
In dock, when pleader would draw tears, the while
He grins. When pious son at funeral pile
Mourns, or lone mother sobs for sole lost son,
He grins. Whate'er, whene'er, howe'er is done,
Of deed he grins. Such be his malady,
Nor kind, nor courteous-so beseemeth me—
Then take thou good Egnatius, rede of mine!
Wert Thou Corrupt Sabine Or A Tiburtine,
Stuffed Umbrian or Tuscan overgrown
Swarthy Lanuvian with his teeth-rows shown,
Transpadan also, that mine own I touch,
Or any washing teeth to shine o'er much,
Yet thy incessant grin I would not see,
For naught than laughter silly sillier be.
Thou Celtiber art, in Celtiberia born,
Where man who's urined therewith loves a-morn
His teeth and ruddy gums to scour and score;
So the more polisht are your teeth, the more
Argue they sipping stale in ampler store.
