Man can give her nothing to take the place of this.
It is the divine
right of the human soul.”
The fatigue and excitement of the Festival had to be paid for: the inevitable reaction set in.
. Decidedly I have spleen in these days.
Throughout my whole body, I feel a mingled restlessness and feebleness, as if the nerves were irritated, and the muscles powerless.
I feel puzzled, too, about the worth of what I have been doing for nearly three years past.
There is no one to help me in these matters.
I determine still to work on and hope on. Much of the work of every life is done in the dark.”
Again: “Spleen to-day, and utter discouragement.
The wind is east, and this gives me the strange feeling, described before, of restlessness and powerlessness.
My literary affairs are in a very confused state.
I have no market.
This troubles me.... God keep me from falling away from my purpose, to do only what seems to me necessary and called for in my vocation, and not to produce for money, praise, or amusement.”
“Was melancholy and Godless all day, having taken my volume of Kant
back to the Athenaeum for the yearly rearrangement.
Could not interest myself in anything.... Visited old Mrs. Sumner
whose chariot and horses are nearly ready.”
At this time there was some question of selling Lawton's Valley
for economic reasons.
The exigency passed, but the following words show the depth of her feeling on the subject: “If I have any true philosophy, any sincere religion, these must support me under the ”