How the Gailed Jade does Wincel
We recollect, when a boy, to have heard the clown in a circus utter the following witticism: Clown.--Master, did you know I had been a soldier?
Master.--No. 1 Not It C. --But I was a soldier, though, and I fit at the battle of Water Gruel, (probably Waterloo
and what exploit did you perform?
C — I made three French soldiers run. M.--Ah!
how did you contrive to do that?
C — Why, I ran first, and every one of them took after me.
We were forcibly reminded of this witticism by the following commentary of the New York Tribune
upon the accounts of the operations in Spotsylvania
given by some of the Richmond
"We elsewhere, from Richmond papers of the 18th and 19th some interesting news which has not before reached us. We fear that cal readers may not put full faith in some of the statements but then the high-toned chivalry of the South
would not condescend to its, not even to keep up the spirit of their fighting white trash — of course not. According to these accounts the several con of Lee
, and Grant
have been a series of unbroken successes for the Confederate
arms; the Northern
troops have been several times successfully enacted, guns and prisoners taken, while their attacks have in every instance been "heavily repulsed with loss" The authors of this good news have singularly forgotten to state that Lee
has whipped Grant
all the way from the Rapidan
to the North
side; we in the North
cell such movements retreats, but then we are only ignorant mudeillis and one southerner is equal to five Yankees, (in lying, we admit) Bend Butler
has been driven to his den on the James
has beer "repulsed with heave loss" ever so many times, and hers is another emission — they do not say that Johnston
has whipped Sherman
forward from Chickamauga
Then they have glorious news from the West Gen. Banks
has been surrounded and his whole army has surrendered and the story about Steele
's surrender is also true in the mains and rebel has been cantankerously showed up in West Virginia
, and would have been quite captured, but his cavalry absurdly interfered, and so the captured did not amount to much."
"We of the North
," it seems, "call such movements" as those of Gen. Lee
"retreats." Let us see what those movements were.--On the 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, and 9th, Grant
tried to drive Lee
before him at the Wilderness
Having lost 35,000 men, according to Yankee statements, and utterly failed, he ran off
by his left towards Spotsylvania Court House, and Lee ran after him.
Taking a shorter cut, Lee
got to the Court-House
first, and Grant
found him there in position and ready to contest his advance.
On the 10th, 11th, and 12th he tried to break through Lee
's lines, and drive him off the field; but in this he failed egregiously, his troops having been slaughtered on the 12th in such a fashion that he has never since been able to bring them to the scratch.
On the 13th, being still in front of Lee
, he beat up for volunteers to assault his lines, and obtained about 6,000; but these heroes
having advanced within two hundred yards of the Confederate
lines, suddenly remembered the 13th, and fled ingloriously.
As long as Grant
remained in front of Lee
stood his ground, delaying him to come on, which he did not dare to do. At last Grant
, after trying for more than a week to bring his men up to the fighting point, a second time made Lee run
by repeating the experiment which had succeeded so well at the Wilderness
— that is, he ran off himself, and Lee
ran after him. Again Lee
took a short cut, and got to the Junction
before he did. There he stood for five days, waiting for Grant
"to fight it out on this line," and Grant
was willing to try the experiment; but his men again refused to come up to the scratch.
A third time Grant
made Lee run
by running first himself, and drawing Lee
"We of the North
," says the Tribune,
"call this a retreat." We of the South
, says the Dispatch,
call it no such thing.
We contend that that party which leaves the ground last, and in rear of the other party, does not retreat, and such were the facts in the case.
As for the reports about Banke's surrender, they came from the Yankees
, and were lies of course, and if Sigel
was not whipped it is difficult to say why he ran away and burned the bridge over the Shenandoah
behind him. Perhaps they do not call such moves retreats in the North
, because the retreating party was not behind the victorious party, as Lee
was behind Grant
But the Tribune
ought to have allowances made for its bad humor.
It has had much to try its temper since this campaign begun, and is in a fair way to have a great deal more.
We tremble for its equanimity, should Grant
file off to the White House
after all his lying and boasting, and assume the line of McClellan
, the man whom the Tribune
especially abhors after having lost half his army in the vain effort to take Richmond
by the Northern