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Enter CAPPADOX, in haste.
to himself . Those who say1 it's bad for bankers to be trusted, utter nonsense; I say it's neither good nor bad for them to be trusted, and that, I've fully experienced this day. They are not2 badly trusted, who never repay, but with whom it is lost outright. As for example, before this Lyco paid me the ten minæ, he had to go to every banker's counter. After there were no proceeds, I summoned the fellow with much noise; he appealed against me to the court. I was most confoundedly afraid that this day he'd be settling accounts with me before the Prætor3; but my friends forced him, so he paid the money at home. Now I'm resolved to make haste to my house. Runs towards his door. THERAPONTIGONUS
Hallo! you Procurer; I want you. PHÆD.
And I want you. CAPPADOX
But I don't want either of you. THERAPONTIGONUS
Stay this instant, will you. PHÆD.
And make you haste to disgorge the money with all despatch. CAPPADOX
to PHÆDROMUS . What have you to do with me? To the CAPTAIN. Or what have you? THERAPONTIGONUS
Because this day I shall be making a javelin of you, discharged from a catapulta, and twist you with the string4, just as the catapultas are in the habit of doing. PHÆD.
I'll this day make a coxcomb of you, to be sleeping with a puppy5 in your bed--an iron one, I mean. CAPPADOX
But I'll make you both to be rotting in a strong-barred prison. THERAPONTIGONUS
Seize him by the throat, and away with him to extreme torture. PHÆD.
However that is, he'll be going there of his own accord. The CAPTAIN seizes him. CAPPADOX
O Gods and men, your aid! that I, uncondemned, and without evidence against me, should thus be dragged along! Prithee, Planesium, and you, Phædromus, do give me assistance. PLANESIUM
Brother, I do beseech you, don't ruin him uncondemned; he treated me kindly and modestly at his house. THERAPONTIGONUS
That was through no inclination of his own; give you thanks to this Æsculapius6 pointing to the Temple that you've preserved your chastity; for if he had been well, he'd long ago have packed you off wherever he could. PHÆD.
Now attend to me, both of you, if I can arrange between you. To the CAPTAIN. You let him go. Procurer, come you this way. I'll pronounce my opinion, if indeed you are ready to abide by what I shall decide you should do. THERAPONTIGONUS
We leaves it to you. He lets go of the PROCURER. CAPPADOX
So long, i' faith, as you give a decision to the effect that no one is to take the money away from me. THERAPONTIGONUS
What, not that which you promised? CAPPADOX
I, promised? How? THERAPONTIGONUS
With your tongue. CAPPADOX
With that same tongue I now gainsay it; that was given me by Nature for the purpose of speaking, not of losing my property. THERAPONTIGONUS
He's trifling; seize the fellow by the throat. Seizes him. CAP. I'll at once then do as you bid me. THERAPONTIGONUS
Since you are an honest man, answer me this that I ask you. CAPPADOX
Ask me what you please. THERAPONTIGONUS
Did you not promise, that if any one should show that she pointing to PLANESIUM was freeborn, you would pay back all the money? CAPPADOX
I don't remember saying so. THERAPONTIGONUS
What, do you deny it? CAPPADOX
I' faith, I really do deny it. In whose presence? In what place was it? THERAPONTIGONUS
In my own presence, and that of Lyco the banker. CAPPADOX
Why don't you hold your tongue? THERAPONTIGONUS
I shan't hold my tongue. CAPPADOX
I don't care a rush for you; don't be bullying me. THERAPONTIGONUS
In my own presence and that of Lyco it took place. PHÆD.
to the CAPTAIN . I quite believe you. Now, therefore, Procurer, that you may know my judgment, pointing to PLANESIUM she is a free woman; he pointing to the CAPTAIN is her brother, and she is his sister; she is engaged to me; do you restore him the money; that's my decision. CAPPADOX
Upon my faith, Phædromus, you have given this decision corruptly. It shall both be bad for you, and you, Captain,--may the Gods and Goddesses confound you. THERAPONTIGONUS
And as for you, you shall be clapt in prison at once, unless the money's returned me. CAPPADOX
Then follow me. THERAPONTIGONUS
Follow you where? CAPPADOX
To my banker--to the Prætor7; for it's there that I pay my money to all persons to whom I'm indebted. THERAPONTIGONUS
I'll be carrying you hence to prison, and not to the Prætor, if you don't pay back the money. CAPPADOX
I do most earnestly wish you may come to a bad end, so don't misunderstand me8. THERAPONTIGONUS
Do you really so? CAPPADOX
I' faith, I really do so. THERAPONTIGONUS
I don't misunderstand these fists of mine. Holding them up. CAPPADOX
What then? THERAPONTIGONUS
What then, do you ask? With these same fists, if you provoke me, I'll be making you quiet immediately. CAPPADOX
taking the money from his girdle . Well then, take this back at once. THERAPONTIGONUS
taking the money . By all means. PHÆD.
Captain, you'll dine with me; the nuptials shall take place to-day. THERAPONTIGONUS
May this matter turn out well for me and for yourselves. An ACTOR.
Spectators, give us your applause.
1 Those who say: This and the following line are clearly in a very corrupt state. Indeed, it is hard to gather any sense whatever from them.
2 They are not: He seems to mean, that, where there is no possibility of the debtor paying back the money, the case is more fortunate than where you are tormented by hopes of getting it back, which, however, are doomed to disappointment.
3 Before the Prætor: He was afraid that Lyco would cheat him, by filing his schedule, or taking the benefit, in the Roman style. See the Note to l. 373 (Act III., Sc. 1).
4 With the string: "Nervus," "a cord," was also the name of the iron chain fastened round the neck and legs of the prisoner. If the debtor did not pay within thirty days after judgment, lie was liable to be thrown into prison by the creditor.
5 With a puppy: He jokes on the double meaning of the word "catellus," which signified "an iron chain," and also "a little dog."
6 To this Æsculapius: Who had not granted him convalescence so soon as he desired.
7 To the Prætor: See the Note to l. 684.
8 Don't misunderstand me: "Ne me nescias." Equivalent to our phrase, "I fully give you to understand."
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