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Bdelycleon
Everything is now tyranny with us, no matter what is concerned, whether it be large or small. Tyranny! [490] I have not heard the word mentioned once in fifty years, and now it is more common than salt-fish, the word is even current on the market. If you are buying gurnards and don't want anchovies, the huckster next door, who is selling the latter, at once exclaims, [495] "That is a man whose kitchen savours of tyranny!" If you ask for onions to season your fish, the green-stuff woman winks one eye and asks, "Ha, you ask for onions! are you seeking to tyrannize, or do you think that Athens must pay you your seasonings as a tribute?"

Xanthias
[500] Yesterday I went to see a whore about noon and told her to get on top; she flew into a rage, pretending I wanted to restore the tyranny of Hippias.

Bdelycleon
That's the talk that pleases the people! As for myself, I want my father to lead a joyous life like Morychus instead of [505] going away before dawn basely to calumniate and condemn; and for this I am accused of conspiracy and tyrannical practice!

Philocleon
And quite right too, by Zeus! The most exquisite dishes do not make up to me for the life of which you deprive me. [510] I scorn your red mullet and your eels, and would far rather eat a nice little lawsuitlet cooked in the pot.

Bdelycleon
That's because you have got used to seeking your pleasure in it; but if you will agree to keep silence and hear me, I think I could persuade you that you deceive yourself altogether.

Philocleon
[515] I deceive myself, when I am judging?

Bdelycleon
You do not see that you are the laughing-stock of these men, whom you are ready to worship. You are their slave and do not know it.

Philocleon
I a slave, I, who lord it over all?

Bdelycleon
Not at all, you think you are ruling when you are only obeying. Tell me, father, [520] what do you get out of the tribute paid by so many Greek towns.

Philocleon
Much, and I appoint my colleagues jurymen.

Bdelycleon
And I also. To the slaves Release him.

Philocleon
And bring me a sword; If I am worsted in this debate, I shall fall on the blade.

Bdelycleon
Tell me whether you will accept the verdict of the Court.

Philocleon
[525] May I never drink my Heliast's pay in honour of the Good Genius, if I do not.

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