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January 7th, 1869 AD (search for this): part 2.13, chapter 2.16
e of unhappiness, and, when death came, I should accept it as a long sleep and rest. But, as this wish of mine cannot be gratified, I turn to what many will do to-day; meditate; think with regret of all the things left undone that ought to have been done; of words said that ought not to have been uttered; of vile thoughts that stained the mind; and resolve, with God's help, to be better, nobler, purer. May Heaven assist all who wish the same, and fill their hearts with goodness! January 7th, 1869. Six days of this New Year are already gone, and one of the resolutions which I made on the first day I have been compelled to break. I had mentally resolved to smoke no more, from a belief that it was a vice, and that it was my duty to suppress it. For six days I strove against the hankering, though the desire surged up strongly. To-day I have yielded to it, as the effort to suppress it absorbed too much of my time, and now I promise myself that I shall be moderate, in order to soot
February 1st (search for this): part 2.13, chapter 2.16
, as the effort to suppress it absorbed too much of my time, and now I promise myself that I shall be moderate, in order to soothe the resentment of my monitor. Still no news of Livingstone, and scant hope of any! Stanley critically examines Aden; notes its unfortified condition, its importance when once the Suez Canal is finished; and sketches its future possibilities as a great distributing centre, and the case of a cheap railway into the heart of Arabia. After ten weeks at Aden, February 1st, I am relieved, at last! And so he turns his back on Livingstone, who is still deep in the wilds of Africa. As he mixes with civilised men in his travels, he is sometimes struck by their triviality, sometimes by their malicious gossip. February 9th, 1869. At Alexandria. Dined with G. D. and his wife. Among the guests was one named J-----. This young man is a frequent diner here, and the gossips of Alexandria tell strange things. Truly the English, with all their Christianity, an
January 1st, 1869 AD (search for this): part 2.13, chapter 2.16
m, designing in some indefinite future to publish it. (It came out five years later.) Then he falls upon a pile of good books which my interesting visit to Greece and Asia Minor induced me to purchase — Josephus, Herodotus, Plutarch, Derby's Iliad, Dryden's Virgil, some few select classics of Bohn's Library, Wilkinson's and Lane's books on Egypt, hand-books to Greece, the Levant, and India, Kilpert's maps of Asia Minor, etc. Worse heat, worse dust, and still no word of Livingstone! New Year's Day, 1869. Many people have greeted me, and expressed their wish that it should be a happy one, and that I should see many more such days. They were no doubt sincere, but what avail their wishes, and what is happiness? What a curious custom it is, to take this day, above all others, to speak of happiness, when inwardly each must think in his soul that it admonishes him of the lapse of time, and what enormous arrears there still remain to make up the sum of his happiness! As for me, I know
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