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123. ode to the North and South.

O Jonathan and Jefferson,
     Come, listen to my song;
I can't decide, my word upon,
     Which of you is most wrong.
I do declare I am afraid
     To say which worse behaves,
The North, imposing bonds on Trade,
     Or South, that Man enslaves.

[103] And here you are about to fight,
     And wage intestine war,
Not either of you in the right;
     What simpletons you are!
Too late your madness you will see,
     And when your passion cools,
“Snakes!” you will bellow; “how could we
     Have been such ‘tarnal fools!”

One thing is certain; that if you
     Blow out each other's brains,
'Twill be apparent what a few
     Each blockhead's skull contains.
You'll have just nothing for your cost,
     To show, when alt is done.
Greatness and glory you'll have lost,
     And not a dollar won.

Oh, joined to us by blood, and by
     The bond of kindred speech,
And further, by the special tie
     Of slang, bound each to each,
All-fired gonies, soft-horn'd pair,
     Each other will you lick?
You everlastina dolts, forbear!
     Throw down your arms right slick!

You'll chaw each other up, you two,
     Like those Kilkenny cats,
When they had better things to do,
     Improvina off the rats.
Now come, shake hands, together jog
     On friendly yet once more;
Whip one another not; and flog
     Creation, as before!

--London Punch, May 25.

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