previous next

I know you are now.

--We heard a good story some time ago, concerning "Abe Linkum," which we do not remember to have seen in print. As goes report, Abe is very fond of the grape in a liquid form, and to such an extent that he frequently navigates, in returning to his domicil, as though he was laying a plan for some one of our zigzag fences. His wife, like all good wives, never attends the celebration of the Feast of Bacchus, neither does she admire his too faithful followers; and never admits her liege lord to her bosom when he has been too active a participator in the feasts. It so happened that one night he had been out to a political meeting, and was returning at a very late hour. He approached the door and knocked. His wife came to the door and said, "I know you, Mr. Lincoln; be off; how often have I told you not to come home when you are drunk?"-- "No, wife, I am not drunk" "But you are, Mr. Lincoln; be off." "Wife, I am not drunk, but have got some of the most glorious news to tell you." "Well, what is it," said Mrs. Lincoln. "Why, I've been nominated for the highest office on earth — for President of the United States!" "Be off, be off be off," said Mrs Lincoln, " I know you're drunk now!" The consequence was, Abe had to assist the stars in their nocturnal vigils.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 United States License.

An XML version of this text is available for download, with the additional restriction that you offer Perseus any modifications you make. Perseus provides credit for all accepted changes, storing new additions in a versioning system.

hide Places (automatically extracted)

View a map of the most frequently mentioned places in this document.

Sort places alphabetically, as they appear on the page, by frequency
Click on a place to search for it in this document.
United States (United States) (1)
hide People (automatically extracted)
Sort people alphabetically, as they appear on the page, by frequency
Click on a person to search for him/her in this document.
Abraham Lincoln (4)
Abe Linkum (1)
Bacchus (1)
hide Display Preferences
Greek Display:
Arabic Display:
View by Default:
Browse Bar: