Aristophanes, Plutus
Eugene O'Neill, Jr., Ed.

Chremylus
No, that is not the meaning of the oracle; there must be another that is nobler. If this blind man would tell us who he is and why and with what object he has led us here, [55] we should no doubt understand what our oracle really does mean.

Cario
To Plutus
Come, tell us at once who you are, or I shall give effect to my threat. He menaces him. And quick too, be quick, I say.

Plutus
I'll thrash you.

Cario
To Chremylus
Do you understand who he says he is?

Chremylus
It's to you and not to me that he replies thus: [60] your mode of questioning him was ill-advised. To Plutus Come, friend, if you care to oblige an honest man, answer me.

Plutus
I'll knock you down.

Cario
Sarcastically
Ah! what a pleasant fellow and what a delightful prophecy the god has given you!

Chremylus
To Plutus
By Demeter, you'll have no reason to laugh presently. [65] If you don't speak—

Cario
I will surely do you an ill turn.

Chremylus
Friends—

Plutus
Take yourselves off and leave me.

Chremylus
No, we won't.

Cario
This, master, is the best thing to do. I'll undertake to secure him the most frightful death; I will lead him to the verge of a precipice [70] and then leave him there, so that he'll break his neck when he pitches over.

Chremylus
Well then, seize him right away.

Cario does so.

Plutus
Oh, no! Have mercy!

Chremylus
Will thou speak then?

Plutus
But if you learn who I am, I know well that you will ill-use me and will not let me go again.

Chremylus
I call the gods to witness that you have naught to fear if you will only speak.

Plutus
[75] Well then, first unhand me.

Chremylus
There! we set you free.

Plutus
Listen then, since I must reveal what I had intended to keep a secret. I am Plutus.

Chremylus
Oh! you wretched rascal! You Plutus all the while, and you never said so!

Cario
[80] You, Plutus, and in this piteous guise! Oh, Phoebus Apollo! oh, ye gods of heaven and hell! Oh, Zeus! is it really and truly as you say?

Plutus
Yes.

Chremylus
Plutus' very own self?

Plutus
His own very self and none other.

Chremylus
But tell me, how come you're so squalid?

Plutus
I have just left Patrocles' house, [85] who has not had a bath since his birth.

Chremylus
But your infirmity; how did that happen? Tell me.

Plutus
Zeus inflicted it on me, because of his jealousy of mankind. When I was young, I threatened him that I would only go to the just, the wise, the men of ordered life; to prevent my distinguishing these, [90] he struck me with blindness! so much does he envy the good!

Chremylus
And yet, it's only the upright and just who honor him.

Plutus
Quite true.

Chremylus
Therefore, [95] if ever you recovered your sight, you would shun the wicked?

Plutus
Undoubtedly.

Chremylus
You would visit the good?

Plutus
Assuredly. It is a very long time since I saw them.

Chremylus
To the audience
That's not astonishing. I, who see clearly, don't see a single one.

Plutus
[100] Now let me leave you, for I have told you everything.

Chremylus
No, certainly not! we shall fasten ourselves on to you faster than ever.

Plutus
Did I not tell you, you were going to plague me?

Chremylus
Oh! I adjure you, believe what I say and don't leave me; for [105] you will seek in vain for a more honest man than myself.

Cario
There is only one man more worthy; and that is I.