The Daily Dispatch: July 12, 1862., [Electronic resource]

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Pitts's Proposal.

--Pitts is a fast man, a sharp man, and a man of business fact. When Pitts goes to make a purchase, he always gets the lowest cash price, and then says, ‘"Well I'll look about, and if I don't find anything that suits me better, I'll call and take this."’ Pitts, like all fast men, is partial to the ladies, young ones in particular. Now, lately, Pitts says to himself, ‘"I am getting rather long in years, and so I'll marry."’ Has business qualities wouldn't let him wait, so off he travels, calls upon a lady friend, and opens conversation by remarking that he would like to know what she thought about his getting married. ‘"Oh, Mr. Pitts, that is an affair in which I am not very greatly interested, and I prefer to leave it with yourself."’ ‘"But,"’ says Pitts, ‘"you are interested, and, my dear girl, will you marry me!"’ The young lady blushed very red, and hesitated; finally, as Pitts was very well in do in the world, not of good standing in society, she accepted him. Whereupon the matter-of-fact. Pitts responded. ‘"Well, I'll look about, and if I don't find anybody that suits me better I'll come back."’