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[72]
After saying this, Trimalchio began to weep floods
of tears. Fortunata wept, Habinnas wept, and then all the slaves began as if they
had been invited to his funeral, and filled the dining-room with lamentation. I had
even begun to lift up my voice myself, when Trimalchio said, “Well, well, if
we know we must die, why should we not live? As I hope for your happiness, let
us jump into a bath. My life on it, you will never regret it. It is as hot as a
furnace.”
“Very true, very true,” said Habinnas, “making two days out of
one is my chief delight.” And he got up with bare feet and began to
follow Trimalchio, who was clapping his hands.
I looked at Ascyltos and said, “What do you think? I shall die on the spot at
the very sight of a bath.”
“Oh! let us say yes,” he replied, “and we will slip[p. 143] away in the crowd while they are looking for the bath.” This was
agreed, and Giton led us through the gallery to the door, where the dog on the chain
welcomed us with such a noise that Ascyltos fell straight into the fish-pond. As I,
who had been terrified even of a painted dog, was drunk too, I fell into the same
abyss while I was helping him in his struggles to swim. But the porter saved us by
intervening to pacify the dog, and pulled us shivering on to dry land. Giton had
ransomed himself from the dog some time before by a very cunning plan; when it
barked he threw it all the pieces we had given him at dinner, and food distracted
the beast from his anger. But when, chilled to the bone, we asked the porter at
least to let us out of the door, he replied, “You are wrong if you suppose you
can go out at the door you came in by. None of the guests are ever let out by
the same door; they come in at one and go out by another.”
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