The pain and pang felt at the death of a son has in itself good cause to
awaken grief, which is only natural, and over it we have no control. For I,
for my part, cannot concur with those who extol that harsh and callous
indifference, which is both impossible and unprofitable.1 For this will rob us of the
kindly feeling which comes from mutual affection and which above all else we
must conserve. But to be carried beyond all bounds and to help in
exaggerating our griefs I say is contrary to nature, and results from our
depraved ideas. Therefore this also must be dismissed as injurious and
depraved and most unbecoming to right-minded men, but a moderate indulgence
[p. 113] in grief is not to be disapproved. ‘Pray
that we be not ill,’ says Crantor 2 of the Academy, ‘but if we be ill, pray that
sensation be left us, whether one of our members be cut off or torn
out.’ For this insensibility to pain 3 is attained by man only at a great
price ; for in the former case, we may suppose, it is the body which has
been brutalized into such insensibility, but in the latter case the soul.